Talk It Through

About this book

It starts with the dishes or a phone at dinner, and twenty minutes later you are having last month's fight again, almost word for word. Talk It Through is a practical toolkit for changing how those conversations go, grounded in decades of couples research, including John and Julie Gottman's work on conflict and repair, PREP's speaker-listener technique, and Nonviolent Communication. You will learn to raise a complaint without starting a war, with 20 before-and-after examples; listen so your partner feels heard even when you disagree; call a time-out when a fight overheats and come back to it; and repair afterward with an apology and a five-step debrief. Then come ready-made scripts and agendas for the topics couples avoid most: money, chores and the mental load, desire differences, in-laws and phones, plus a 30-minute weekly check-in that keeps small problems small. It works for couples of any gender combination, even if only one of you reads it, and is clear about when to seek couples therapy and how to recognize abuse and coercive control. Printable script cards and worksheets included. Start with the first sentence.

1. 1Printable worksheets & templates (PDF)All appendices of the book as a print-ready PDF.498 KB Buyers only

Watch in your library after purchase

Preview

You're at the best part.

Unlock the full book

About the author